Agoraphobia

I think I have developed a fear of leaving my house. I think that’s called agoraphobia. But I don’t think it’s so bad that I could classify it as a fear. Working from home makes me get used to never going anywhere. I have to do my work in my house, and then by the time I am finished working, there isn’t really any time to do anything else.

Whenever someone invites me out I don’t really feel like going. It’s weird because I do want to do things. I don’t want to sit around in my house doing nothing all day. But when the invitation to go and do something comes, it seems like such a hassle. We need to plan out when to meet. I need to travel for several hours just to get anywhere since none of my friends live close to me. Then there is the part where I have to pick out clothes and get dressed. I need to make myself look presentable to the world.

I don’t like getting like this. I want to experience the world and do things, but the more I stay at home the less I want to leave. I know the easiest way to do this would be to force myself to go outside more often, but I can’t do that because work requires me to stay at home. And I can’t bring my work with me because I work on a desktop computer. Although it would be really funny to see a little person like me carrying a huge imac on a bus. And then I would walk into starbucks and plug it in like it’s no big deal. I may have to do this just as a sort of social experiment. People would probably think they were on a prank show.